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I inchwormed to the trolley
double-bagged in plastic knowing
something’s gonna give. Shit!

Where are my eggs? I fret – beneath
emerald Stellas or two-percents, I bet.

*Phew* there they lay! Safe below GMO
cereal varnished in fructose, above
all-natural chicken breasts.
All-natural like breasts
feeding newborns. No hormones,
no antibiotics they said.

(We’re all farmed).

Time a uterus, will I make it
before the doors vaginismus on me?

Don’t fail me quilted toilet rolls
cinnamon raisin rolls
2-fer-1 Tostitos
and Double Stuf Oreos from checkout counter.

Push my button for me.
Please. Thank you, dog-person
in chartreuse with no kids. Shit!

Did I miss anything on my list? Hummus.
To replace the vitriol that is
cholesterol of eggs. Elevator jaws *kerrrpluck*
them be my eggs.