Big Byte was in Bangalore for the past 11 days. 11 days of long-distance, which was just enough for my mind to fester with the most morbid scenarios. Before Nibbles, these pessimistc travels would often converge upon me ending up a prozac-popping, suicidal alcoholic waiting to be drafted by anarchist rebels. Now, however, I don’t have the…eh…luxury of letting my life irresponsibly self-destruct if anything were to happen to Big Byte. Because of Nibbles of course.

I need a solid plan with multiple back-ups. Check insurance. Terminate lease. Draft will. Chuck the car. Get another job. Find daycare? No. Return to…where? India? My parents? No. Our family wouldn’t make sense without Big Byte.

*feeding break*

Nothing like a surge of oxytocin to calm a chaotic mind and bring the focus back to where it should be – the present. Tharini spoke of this ideal state in this beautiful post that made so much sense, even to an atheist like me.

Ok. So right now, both my boys are tucked in and fast asleep. There’s a box of duty-free Toblerone waiting to be devoured. And I can finally take a looong shower, with the doors closed and without having to run out every 30 seconds to pacify Nibbles as he wiggles furiously in his bouncer. *Exhaaale*